Blog

...by someone putting the phrase 'please call this man and waste his time' on the front?

After my last entry I thought I'd heard the last of the loony PR fraternity but then I get another one.

"Hello", she says. "I want to talk to you about my entrepreneurial client."

"OK," I say. "Fire away."

"He's founded a club in London for businesspeople, because there was nothing else on offer except the Groucho Club," she says.

"There's the IoD," I say.

"That's different," she enthuses. "The IoD isn't geared up for meetings."

"Fifty-odd meeting rooms, two large coffee areas, a brasserie, sandwich bar and a formal restaurant and it's not geared up for meetings?" I respond.

"Oh well, it's not the same thing..." she says.

Only the Groucho indeed. Just the sort of thing to turn me into Victor Meldrew for the day.

Seriously, I welcome calls from PRs. I like getting them. I'm a nice man. But if you haven't bothered to find out the first thing about your client or their market before picking up the phone, don't expect me to be a pushover.

The call comes in from a public relations executive. I want to talk about our new client's word processor, she says. Unlike Word, it looks for grammatical errors.

So does Word, I say.

No, look, it doesn't just do spelling. It does grammar.

Yes, so does Word, I say.

There's this long pause and she promises to send me an e-mail. I can hardly wait.

So I launched HRPodcast last week - soft launch, not with a bang, going to be a slow burner this one. Inevitably I'm looking for interviewees.

I get this e-mail from a PR. Good timing, they say, our client's just done a podcast about HR. OK, I say, but doesn't that make them a competitor rather than a source? Oh, we can change the intro if you like, they say.

I'm still trying to work that one out as I type...

Here's a good site, called the Churner Prize. What's 'churner', you ask? It's simply a reference to churning, the act of turning a press release into editorial copy without bothering to sanity check, go and find your own story or anything old-fashioned like that.

It's something journalists are never encouraged to do (that should probably be 'encouraged never to do' in English). A lot of us end up doing it from time to time, though - in technology journalism it can actually be valid sometimes in order to make completely sure your technical details are accurate in whichever story you're writing at the time.

It's an excellent idea, highlighting lazy journalism like this, and a wake-up call to many of us. I'll no doubt fail completely to let you all know when one of my pieces makes it onto the site.

So yesterday I was MC-ing the Britain's Top Employers awards at the British Library. An enjoyable event I hope, and a reflection of the release of the annual Britain's Top Employers book.

Notes to self: no matter who's told you what, or indeed thinks they have, always find out who else is speaking before you agree to do something like this. And if the MD of the parent company, who's been asked three times whether he wants to speak and has said no thanks, suddenly gets up and asks whether it's his turn, accommodate him.

Otherwise you end up introducing the awards about half an hour early. And only a fool would do that...(COUGH)...

Now this is interesting - no, really, stay with me. London Mayoral Candidate Boris Johnson has been awarded the Chartered Institute of Public Relations' Presidents medal for communicator.

Cat, meet pigeons, pigeons, meet hornets nests and other mixed metaphors. On his 'A PR Guy's Musings' blog Stuart Bruce is outraged. He points out that Boris has described black people in pejorative terms and committed other lapses in taste and common sense, and his howlers are a long-term trend rather than a one-off.

I have to confess Boris has always fascinated me. He acts like a buffoon but everyone knows he isn't; he's also a damned good writer, perhaps oddly. His book on Rome should be read by everyone with a vague interest in ancient history, you'll end up caring passionately about it and I have no doubt the series on which it was based, which I missed, would have been just as enjoyable.

The problem is that he's reached this age - he's about the same age as me - when being a court jester just isn't as worthwhile an occupation as it used to be if he has any ambitions whatsoever. So he's gone for something that requires some sort of depth and will involve actual responsibility.

And this, dear reader, is where it's all likely to start going wrong. The thing about 'characters' in the media who're also in politics is that they can often make excellent points and be really good voices of conscience, from either side of the spectrum. In the 1960s Tony Benn was superb at telling the Labour Government where it was going wrong. He then joined the Cabinet and ended up in a lot of trouble for not towing the party line. In the 1960s and 1970s there was no-one better than Michael Foot at critiquing the Government of whichever political stripe - then he became Labour leader, had to compromise and fell rapidly from favour.

Boris until recently was great. He appeared on talk shows, called for classical education for all (unrealistic perhaps but is it really so far from the new proposals to get kids into culture?) and can make the odd excellent point, without necessarily being party political.

To this extent he's a superb communicator and his ability to publicise himself and make himself likeable to people who don't share his politics is unsurpassed. If he'd had this award two years ago I'd have probably agreed with it. The thing is, he's getting it now, when he's putting himself up for something serious and fighting against a heavyweight and the communication suggesting 'I'm a heavyweight too and I can stop Ken Livingston' simply hasn't happened.

So, should he have got the award? I'm going to suggest not, at least not at this stage. From the comments on Bruce's blog I suspect I'm not the only one who thinks like this.

OK, I've had enough of people saying they can't get hold of me, I'm elusive, they don't know what I'm doing. They say this sometimes when it actually is some of their business as well as when it isn't (hell hath no fury than a PR who wants to know whether you received a press release three weeks ago, don't y'know).

So I've set up a Twitter page at http://twitter.com/guyclapperton. You need to register and drop me a note as to why you need to know what I'm doing during office hours, and I'll add you to the list.

You can also instant message me as Guy@Clapperton.co.uk on Windows Live, guy.clapperton on Google Talk, or guyclapperton@mac.com if you're on the iChat system on a Mac.

I should, in short, be pretty much available. Including at the speaking event mentioned in the last blog entry with the:101, see speaking page here, I hope to see some of you there.

...but apparently I'm supposed to. All blokes are. So I assume anyway, from a company that's tried to flog me some press releases on...well, here's a link to a blog from someone else who's had the same release and they've phrased it much better than I have>

http://gettingink.typepad.com/getting_ink/2007/10/things-you-migh.html

So I'm working away, printing quite innocently and suddenly the toner runs out on my multifunction machine - it's a printer, scanner, answering machine, photocopier etc. OK, not a problem, I didn't need much printing so I didn't worry about it.

Then I go out for a while and get back to find it's taken a couple of messages. But it won't play them. Because the answering machine will take messages but not play them back if there's no toner in the thing.

I like technology. I do like technology...

Special thanks to Brando for supplying the following information about the phones Sony Ericsson is supplying through Voda - this is formatted exactly as I received it. I assume it's in binary or something:

Facts and figures:

W910i W880i V640i
Walkman® player

Bluetooth stereo (A2DP)
Mega Bass™
Music tones (MP3/AAC)
Memory Stick Micro™ (M2&trade support
Media Manager
PlayNow™
TrackID™
RSS feeds
Polyphonic ringtones
FM radio with RDS
Camera
Digital zoom
Picture blogging
Video blogging
Video recording
WLAN/Wi-Fi™
Web browser

Speakerphone
Vibrating alert
Video calling
Email
Microsoft® Exchange ActiveSync®
Operating System
Bluetooth™ 2.0 technology
Picture messaging (MMS)
Predictive text input
Sound recorder
Text messaging (SMS)
Navigation key
Picture wallpaper
Wallpaper animation
3D games
Java™ MIDP 2.0
Video streaming
Video playback
Alarm clock
Calculator
Calendar
Flight mode
Notes
Stopwatch Walkman®
player 3.0
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
PlayNow™ 4.0
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
2 megapixel
2.5x
Yes
Yes
Yes
No
Access NetFront™
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
OSE
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes Walkman® player 2.0
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Disc2Phone
PlayNow™ 4.0
Yes
Yes
Yes
No
2 megapixel
2.5x
Yes
Yes
Yes
No
Access NetFront™
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
No
OSE
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes No

Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
PlayNow™ 4.0
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
2 megapixel
4x
Yes
Yes
Yes
No
Full HTML Browser
Yes
Yes
No
Yes
No
OSE
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
15 fps
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes
Yes

This is for people who read this irregular blog whenever I post something - it's a YouTube video of an interview with an American beauty queen.

No, look, you've got to read this.

OK, I've been on holiday on possibly the most interesting week in media terms in recent times. Sorry about that, and I hope everyone's OK in spite of the floods.

But what can you make of the BBC at the moment? 'Crisis of confidence' seems not to cover it. Charity phone-ins rigged, Blue Peter competitions faked, what on earth is going on?

Most interesting is the BBC's view that these things are intolerable. And they won't put up with them. Thing is, they're saying these things while they're putting up with them. and tolerating them, unless someone's been fired and they're keeping it quiet.

I'm a big BBC fan. I still believe our TV is the best in the world. I'm just a little concerned that in spite of all the noise, nothing has actually happened about this.

Not that I'm obsessed with this blog or anything. It's just that I've agreed to do this piece for a supplement for one of the Nationals. Two pieces in fact.

OK, five pieces, but three are done. I agreed to do these in January/February with a long deadline, and the reason three of them are done is twofold. First, if I'm honest, I organised them better. Second, though, the case studies who'd agreed to be profiled, the PRs who set them up, didn't suddenly get in touch a fortnight ago after loads of delays and tell me they weren't going to play.

So here I am. Tuesday evening. Typing. Actually, typing and hoping against hope that the people - no, let's call them saints! - who've agreed to step in at the last minute, one of whom is in France and the other in America, will hit the 'send' key on their preliminary answers to me so I can check they're the right people and follow up with some questions to get some quotes.

Work-life balance? Don't make me laugh...

OK, so I'm a jammy swine - I was invited to the Baftas this year as well as the after-show party as Pioneer's guest. Many thanks to them.

I guessed all of the prizewinners, but unfortunately guessed most of them wrong; Mitchell and Webb were among the two I got right and I was delighted to see my old Week Ending producer Gareth Edwards, who now produces their show, achieve that sort of recognition. The other one I got right was the Pioneer audience award, which went to Life On Mars and quite rightly too.

I gather, though, that I'm the only person in the UK who doesn't 'get' Victoria Wood as a serious actress. Nor do I get why the TV broadcast of the awards cut out her winning her first award of the evening when her comments on winning her second only made sense if you'd seen the first.

But what the heck do I know. It was a cracking evening out and if you ever get the chance to go, do so.

Personally I think anyone who doesn't know me or Sally from Adam probably has the less cluttered perspective, but what do I know. Sally's freelance too, so I'd guess if there are any commissions going for personal appearances now that we're apparently celebrities famous enough to be quoted in adverts, you know where to find us...

Now, I'm not one to moan about PRs usually. They do a tough job and are under a lot of pressure. To be frank I don't think I could do it. Nevertheless, from the whacky world of the last half an hour in my life, here are a few guidelines on how to work with a journalist if you have a product or service to push.

1. When a journalist e-mails you with a request, under no circumstances read it all the way through. Hacks are much happier if you just pick up on a key word and pitch something wholly irrelevant to what we're writing.

2. If a journalist is after information on products and pictures only, having written a column around this structure for the whole of this century, don't offer them either - offer them an interview with someone instead. They'll like that and of course the British media will change its structures to accommodate your client.

3. If a journalist has specified he or she is writing in a column specifically aimed at the small business and self-employed market, ignore him and pitch something that's clearly aimed at another area entirely. When he comments on this, tell him small businesses need to know.

4. If a journalist specifies that he isn't interested in a particular category of product, send him information anyway. And at least four high-res pics. Under no circumstances check that he has a broadband connection before sending the lot.

5. Just in case, if the journalist has multiple e-mail addresses, send it to all of them rather than just the one he's asked for. We like multiple copies of stuff we didn't ask for in the first place, tidying up our hard disks keeps us off the streets.

I could go on...

My thanks to Andrew Smith for pointing me in the direction of this - a brilliantly-written view of a PR's day. Do read it when you get a minute.

OK, it's Friday, it's hot, this isn't a journalism story but Clare Fisher of journalism.co.uk sent it to the UKpress list so everyone's got to see it.

http://www.theage.com.au/news/world/how-much-for-that-doggie/2007/04/27/1177459936217.html

I suggest they call them all Shaun.

I've just received a press release from a company called PR Minds. It
looks very important so I've cut and pasted the entire text below (subject
header was just 'PRESS RELEASE'):


News Section(s):
,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,
ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,A
SP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,ASP,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Software Development,Software
Development,Software Development,Applications,Applications,
Applications,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applica
tions,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applications,A
pplications,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applicat
ions,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applications,Ap
plications,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applicati
ons,Applications,Applications,Applications,Applications,App
lications,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,C
onvergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,
Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence
,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,Convergence,CRM,CRM,CR
M,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,CRM,C
RM,CRM,CRM,CRM,Databases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Data
bases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Dat
abases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Da
tabases,Databases,Databases,Databases,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers, Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributo! rs
Res ellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors Resellers,Distributors
Resellers,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Bus
iness,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Busines
s,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-
Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Business,E-Busi
ness,E-Business,E-Business,Education Training,Education
Training,Education Training,Education Training,Education
Training,Education Training,Education Training,Education
Training,Education Training,Education Training,Education Training,Educa
tion Training,Education Training,Education Training,Education
Training,Education Training,Education Training,Education
Training,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Enterprise software,Enterprise
software,Enterprise software,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial
Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial
Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial
Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial
Results,Financial Results ,Financial Results,Financial Results,Financial
Results,Handh! elds,Han
dhelds,Handhelds,Handhe
lds,Handhelds,Handhelds
,Handhelds,Handhelds,Ha
ndhelds,Handhelds,Handh
elds,Handhelds,Handheld
s,Handhelds,Handhelds,H
andhelds,Handhelds,Handhelds,Handhelds,Handhelds,Handhelds,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP Business,Internet - IP
Business,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP
,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP,ISP, IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT
Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT
Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT
Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT Services,IT
Services,IT Services,IT
Services,Media,Media,Me
dia,Media,Media,Media,M
edia,Media,Media,Media,
Media,Media,Media,Media
,Media,Media,Media,Medi
a,Media,Media,Media,Med
ia,Media,Media,Media,Me
dia,Media,Media,Media,Media,Media,Media,Media,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Mobile Wireless,Mobile
Wireless,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Mult
imedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedi! a,Multim
edia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia
,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Multimedia,Network OS,Network
OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network
OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network
OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network OS,Network
OS,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Network
ing,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networ
king,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Netwo
rking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Netw
orking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Networking,Open
Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open
Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open
Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open Source,Open
Source,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peri
pherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Per
ipherals,Peripher
als,Peripherals,P
eripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Peripherals,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,Personal Computing,Personal
Computing,Personal Computing,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency
- Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency -
Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency -
Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency -
Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency -
Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency - Media,PR Agency -
Media,Security,Security,Security,Security,Security,Se
curity,Security,Security,Security,Security,Security,S
ecurity,Security,Security,Security,Se
curity,Security,Security,Security,Servers,Servers,Servers,Se! rvers,Se
rvers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,
Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Servers,Server
s,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Stor
age,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,Storage,St
orage,Storage,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom Applications,Telecom
Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom
Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom
Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom H
ardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom
Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom Hardware,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom
Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Operators,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,Telecom Services,Telecom
Services,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,
VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,VoIP,Web S! ervices, Web
Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web
Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web
Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web
Services,Web Services,Web Services,Web Services,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless Technology,Wireless
Technology,Wireless Technology,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market Research,Telecoms Market
Research,Telecoms Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT
Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market
Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT
Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market
Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT
Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market Research,IT Market
Research,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms
Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms
Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms
Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms
Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms Event,IT/Telecoms
Event

Well as it happens there are a lot of us criticising Blair at the moment. Nobody has asked me for any quotes and I don't blame them; I'm underqualified and underexperienced as any sort of political commentator. You might as well ask someone in the street, you'd have as good a chance of getting an eloquent and informed quote.

Which is what brings me to Mr. Gallagher. Why does someone assume that a by-now-ageing rocker is going to be any more enlightening than someone who's examined the issues and considered them dispassionately? It's not just Gallagher of course; ever since Harold Wilson feted the Beatles in the 1960s people have been assuming that musicians will have some sort of channel into meaningful, insightful conclusions.

Personally I think it's bunk. These are entertainers and they do a solid job of it. For some reason since the 1960s entertainers have also become spokespeople for causes, whether it's actors speaking out about Vietnam or Gallagher being pestered for views on the Prime Minister. Personally I think it's time to let them start entertaining again and leave specialist matters to the specialists - or get some comment from non-rich non-stars with whom the rest of us can identify. It won't happen of course, but wouldn't it be nice.

Anyone who enjoyed yesterday's entry with its reference to the new ad campaign from Apple might be interested to read some of the reaction there's been from His Billness.

You'd have thought a simple ad would have been either a giggle or not and that would have been it. But no, apparently Bill Gates is taking it all terribly personally.

I'll be honest, I'm writing this on a Mac and enjoying doing so, but I'd been a PC user before this and happy enough. They're boxes, they work, the Mac looks a bit better in my home so that's what I use, the end and they all lived happily ever after. But I do enjoy these occasional spats between people who think the damned things actually matter to most of us other than as a means to an end.

I'll keep you posted.

I don't normally highlight ads that people should watch but Apple's answer to the Microsoft Vista operating system is inspired:

http://movies.apple.com/movies/us/apple/getamac/apple-getamac-security_480x376.mov

I'm indebted to Andrew Taylor for pointing this out.

Just seen BBC economics correspondent Evan Davis' new blog. As you'd expect from a professional journalist it's well-written although his brief is so far-reaching I wonder how thorough he'll be able to make it over the coming weeks?

The best entry and the most commented-upon so far, inevitably, is the one about the price of wine. Davis applies simple economics to buying - if it's expensive then it's bound to be good, in other words.

Well, up to a point. The duty on wine is fixed so if you buy one bottle at £4 and another at £8 then the £8 bottle actually has well over twice the value of wine in it compared to the £4 version.

It's not that straightforward, however. I might understand that a sweet Sauterne is superbly crafted, for example, but I still wouldn't touch it because I can't stand the stuff. Then there are the so-called bargains. A lot of my friends have been buying wines at 50 per cent less than their RRP lately and have been surprised that they're not that great. It's not until someone points out that something that wouldn't shift for the original price is likely to have been overinflated in the first place that the penny drops.

My own instinct is to try something and then decide whether you like it or not, and if you really like it, keep a note somewhere. Call me old-fashioned but it seems to work.

OK, I've been quiet lately but it's that time of year for self-employed people - 31 January and therefore tax deadline day is only days away.

Yicch.

For people who aren't self-employed, the system works thus: you declare your income and expenditure for the financial year ended pretty much ages ago and send your figures in. You also put in your personal finances for the same period. Your accountant calls you in a panic - or rather doesn't because he's up to his eyes. You then find out he or she needs more detail and they assume you know exactly what by osmosis.

I'll be blogging again by the end of the week. Just don't be surprised if the blog looks somehow tear-stained...

...is also the least sociable thing I've done for ages by far but hey. that's life. On Boxing Day - that's Boxing Day, mark you - I was up at 6.00am to drive to the BBC for an 8.40 interview. I've been trying to get a slot on the breakfast show for, oh, ages now and finally they called me in.

A cynic - OK, my father-in-law - might suggest that they'd take anyone mug enough to get up at that time on Boxing Day but I can only say that the combination of producer Sarah Ryan and presenters JoAnne Good and Baylen Leonard are an unusually welcoming combination, particularly since they'd been broadcasting since 6.00 and no doubt preparing the show for an hour or so before then.

Sometimes you get these things you really want to do again. Fingers crossed.

Or at least stop telling everyone you must have been sober on the night you can't account for because you got home OK. Loads of us do it when plastered - it's not difficult. Even then, you could draw the line at explaining your route home from Green Park to Streatham - a claim that you did this straightforwardly via London Bridge is tosh, the straightforward route is Green Park tube then change at Stockwell and straight to Tooting Bec.

The real problem is that the Bishop is claiming he wasn't drunk and because of his position everyone thinks it's hilarious. So whatever ill-advised interview he gives, he's not going to win.

I do wonder about some of the other conditions that could produce the same symptoms as this, though. Supposing, after proper medical assessment, he wasn't drunk but was found to have had a stroke? Or that this was the onset of Alzheimer's? It might not sound quite so hilarious I suppose, and won't sell the papers. But deep down inside me there's a niggle that says a middle aged to elderly man found completely out of control is more of a cause for concern than for a laugh.

One such occasion has happened to me just recently - or indeed several such occasions. I'd been to a meeting or two with Microsoft's PRs, informally. We spoke, among other things, about Microsoft's new "Office Live" offering. I couldn't get to the formal launch but that was OK, I knew about the product. I thought.

I assumed - quite wrongly, it turns out - that this was the long-threatened, by analysts if not by Microsoft itself, version of Office onto which you could log from anywhere - a fully-hosted application suite. Sounded a good idea to me. I made noises like "people have tried this in the days before broadband and of course it didn't work", and of course Microsoft - which was preparing Office Live, which is actually a web-writing and hosting and e-mailing product - agreed. I said, people will have to trust the host implicitly and reliability will be everything. Microsoft agreed again.

Looking back on it, I couldn't have done a better job of not quite asking the question or making the comment that would have alerted them to the fact that I had completely the wrong concept in my mind if I'd tried really, really hard. So it didn't occur to me that when I mentioned the launch in the AOB section of the Guardian's Business Sense supplement I was actually outlining an entirely different product to that which Microsoft had actually launched.

I have to say Inferno PR, Microsoft's voice on Earth for this product set, has been very professional and constructive about the whole affair. It'll be sorted out relatively painlessly. Mistakes and misunderstandings happen.

But if anyone ever sees me looking complacent about what I do, feel free to whisper 'Office Live' into my ear. I might not look pleased but a swift reminder won't do me any harm.

Great piece from VNUNet speaks of David Cameron's blog which has video and all sorts of clever stuff. It seems he's been clever but not clever enough to register www.webcameron.info - which, inevitably, has therefore been snapped up by UKIP. They've put a comedy sketch about Cameron aping Tony Blair up there.

Except...

They nicked the sketch from YouTube, and it's copy protected. So when you open the page you can't see the sketch.

Tories and UKIP both making fools of themselves at the same time. Oh, happy day....

A silly thing for a Friday morning is Blogshares, in which your favourite blogger gets his or her site rated according to how many people link to it.

As you can see, my value is increasing almost alarmingly - sadly this doesn't translate into actual money...

If you ever think you're getting jaded and have seen everything, look at something like this:

http://j-walkblog.com/index.php?/weblog/posts/canine_americans/

Yes I know it's cheap, and yes I know that this bloke's only one nutter among, I'm sure, a quite sane nation. But being only just back from walking my Canine Briton I'm surprised to find someone doesn't want her to be classified as a dog any more...

Anyone want to know the time?

http://www.yugop.com/ver3/stuff/03/fla.html

What a superb place Bewdley in the Midlands is for a break. Genuinely interesting local museum with activities for the kids, the Severn with a bunch of very attractive swans, a safari park which my daughter loved only five minutes away...highly recommended.

And I'm refreshed enough to be glad to be back. Work's coming in and oh yes, the new edition of Britain's Top Employers is out from the Guardian and the Corporate Research Foundation. It's my third as editor, fourth as contributor and we're now doing them on an annual turnaround.

Which means there's no time for a party as it's just about now that we start working on the next one. Which will, of course, be even better than the current book, with which I'm happier than its predecessor.

More on this anon. Meanwhile I'm happy to say it looks as though there'll be more podcasts to talk about soon...actually I'm quite happy at the moment...

OK, it wasn't perfect. The Woman's Hour interview/debate is now on the web and you can listen to it very soon by clicking here. I've trained people to speak to journalists and told them they need to be fluent, calm and everything - and of course when it was me I noticed every umm and aah that went on the hour. But I think my points were made, intact. And Jenni Murray was a sympathetic interviewer.

Overall I rather enjoyed that.

So I get a mail from the BBC picking my brains for a contact from a piece I wrote on work/life balance a while back for the Guardian. And I get chatting on the subject to the researcher, and we seem to get on OK. Then the producer calls...

...and what do you know, I'm on Woman's Hour tomorrow talking about self-employment and work/life balance issues. It's only for a few minutes but it's a paid radio gig on the BBC.

I'm quite disproportionately pleased about that. In fact I'm just very pleased, and if I can set up a link to the item through 'Listen Again' it'll be up here tomorrow. Anyone else needing any voice work done, you know where I am.

Easy - you frame it as a poll and the BBC does something like this. I imagine most of these movies will be turning up on Film4 anytime now...

I've just had one of those ordinary things happen to me that are nonetheless truly annoying.

A few weeks ago I was offered an interview with a minor celebrity - emphasis on the 'minor' but never mind. She's setting up in business and it sounded vaguely sellable. So I sent out a few mails and didn't give it much more thought.

Then yesterday the features editor of a national paper gets back to me with a 'yes please'. It was for the main features section and this might have opened a new market for me - might have opened up all sorts of new markets, you never know. The word rate was superb. I was what we call in the trade 'motivated' - which isn't a bad thing in this heat.

Only, when I get back to the PRs, they tell me that the same paper's business section already has a piece going in. So I get back to my commissioning editor - and there's no criticism, he couldn't possibly have known about it - and understandably his view is that the pre-existing interview in the same paper kills the piece stone dead.

One of those things, certainly, but damn. Damn, damn, damn.

It's that summer holiday time again - from the schools' point of view anyway. Charlotte is off, so she's in her room 'tidying up' for a while as I finish some bits and pieces of work. Her version of tidying up seems to involve jumping up and down on her bed quite a bit, but I digress.

This leaves me sort of part-time until September. This could be quite a giggle, going part time and seeing whether anyone can actually see a difference; given the school run you could argue I've been doing it for a while already.

If I find I'm more engaged whilst working shorter hours and my money actually goes up, I'll be doing more of this...

Damn.

So I get up this morning all raring to go for the Sport Relief mile. The child-minding had fallen through so I was going to have to take my daughter, but no matter. It was going to be fine.

Then she was tired. But that was OK, we could walk.

Then she started straining to put her trainers on. How long, we asked, have they been too tight? Quite a long time, was the answer. OK, we thought, the school plimsoles came back yesterday - but these, too, were on the small side, it turned out. And she was flagging even whilst putting them on.

So rather absurdly I'm sitting here having raised £215 (many thanks to all who donated) without having run a mile. I promise, promise, promise I'll do one, even if it's on the treadmill at the gym.

But if anyone spends all of Monday mailing me about how it went today, don't be surprised if I sound a little frustrated.

If you ever want proof that some people just don't listen, here's a summary of a phone call I received today.

"Hello, Mr. Clapperton? It's PC World Business. You have an account with us and haven't bought anything for ages - we'd like to know whether it was the service, the products, or what we can do to help."

"Oh, er, right. Actually I'm a freelance journalist. About four years ago the Guardian asked me to do a bit of mystery shopping and pretend to be a businessperson, and to write about how I was treated. I wrote it up and that was that, really."

"Oh, OK. So, are you in a position to buy something now?"

Duh...

And the prize for the most desperate, sad headline on a press release this year so far goes to this one:

"UK Beats Portugal in Tackling Spyware Threat"

Lucky we didn't win the match or it would have ruined it for them...

The Times says it has been enormously successful in a recent promotion in which people sent texts for a free DVD. The story is here.

I've no doubt it's true, and indeed we received our Railway Children DVD as a result of the promotion last week. What they don't tell you, though, is that we were sent two copies in error. OK, 'Guy gets extra DVD' isn't much of a story - but if multiple mailouts skew the figures at all then the claims of success could be a little exaggerated. And even if they don't, since the cost of the text was simply to pay for the postage then any accidental send-outs of extra copies must by definition push the whole project into the red.

Hopefully we were an isolated case. Otherwise they stand to spend an awful lot before they realise where their money's disappearing to.